Connection.

To find a way to you. A bridge. A bow line. A tunnel. A link in a daisy chain.

That is why I write this blog. To connect. To connect with you. With people I love. With strangers. With myself. With the universe.

I feel that is why we are put on this planet. To form bonds. To see, and if we are lucky, to touch the souls of others.

Last week I was far from connected. I was pretty disconnected actually. Mostly from myself.

It was the first time I hadn’t felt like writing since I started writing two years ago. The first time I avoided it. The first time I was afraid of it.

At the time, I wasn’t sure why I was sharing my insecurities with you. But I am sure now. It was for that connection.

I stripped myself bare for a moment and tried to just honor where I was. I tried to work through the questions by putting them out there; by getting them out of my own head; by sharing them with you. I wanted to clear my mind of the noise and also I wanted people to understand, I wanted myself to understand, that it is human nature to doubt out ourselves. And this is ok. Just as long as we don’t get comfortable and set up camp there.

I wanted to be real and true about my doubts because honestly, who can be up all the time? Whose life is always sunshine and rainbows? Who doesn’t have shadows of uncertainty looming inside? If I said that was me, I would be lying. And I am guessing, the same could be said of you.

Last week in my candor, I learned a few important things.

First, I found that it is ok to embrace these feelings. They are part of me. Part of my experience, my truth, and I should not try to hide from them. They are just part of what makes me multidimensional. They are actually something to celebrate and be excited about. The feeling of fear means I am onto something. Feeling uncomfortable means something is trying to grow and blossom, it just needs to push through the dirt and the darkness.

You can be sure, there is no fear or uncertainty in complacency. In mediocrity. There is only apathy and disinterest.

Fear means things are changing.

As I listened to people who have been there, who have been afraid because the footing they were on was shaky, I became encouraged. I realized I was not the only one. And I was reminded that fear is normal when you are pushing yourself into unchartered territory.

[Tweet “Fear is normal when you are pushing yourself into unchartered territory.”]

Fear is how we know we are doing something meaningful.

[Tweet “Fear is how we know we are doing something meaningful.”]

The second thing I learned is that when you make yourself vulnerable and put yourself out there, people respond. They respond according to their own truth, but they do respond. I was engulfed with light through the comments people left. Some reached out to make sure I was okay. I don’t think people are used to me showing fear and gloom. It made some people worry. Some uncomfortable. And some show extreme kindness. I appreciated all the lifelines that were hurled in my direction.

The most important thing that was brought to light last week is that in order for true connection to happen, there needs to be a level of vulnerability. A shedding of the masks, the pretenses, and frankly the bullshit that hides the truth.

Only when we are able to be vulnerable and honest, with ourselves and with others, can we truly connect on a level with any depth or meaning.

Until then, it’s all a facade.

So thank you for allowing me to connect with you in that way.

Salty Kisses,

Karen

 

Photo: Stockvault