How To Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Start A Business: An Interview With Someone Who Knows

I love talking to people who inspire me and finding out their story. I am constantly on a hunt for learning how people overcome their fears and follow their dreams. Patti Blake, owner of Blue Moon Cares Boutique in Seal Beach, California, has been my inspiration from the get go.

With minimal business experience, Patti opened her own philanthropic boutique and has turned it into a thriving business. A business that, in those three years, has donated $80,000 to worthy causes.

Blue Moon’s mission statement:

Blue Moon exists as a philanthropic, community based small business. Our passion is equally shared in finding uniquely beautiful and interesting products, as it is for the charities it supports. ​Blue Moon is a gathering place for people interested in coming together for friendship, fun, and fashion as well as helping others in the community and beyond.

I was intrigued by how Patti took such a leap outside of her comfort zone and became a business owner. I wanted to know her secret for overcoming her fears to set her dreams in motion.

Karen – Well you know you inspire me because of your courage. I think starting Blue Moon took a hell of a lot of courage. Especially given the fact you didn’t have a business background.

Patti – I never knew I would open up a boutique, but I did grow up sewing. I loved it. I sewed my own clothes and I just came alive in fabric stores. I still do.

Karen – So you’ve always had that passion, that creative passion.

Patti -Yeah. There was a time I thought I wanted to be in interior design and then I made a pair of curtains for somebody. After that I thought, “No way.” I knew I didn’t want to do that.

Karen – I think that’s still valuable information. We have to do that along the way; try new things out to know what we don’t want to do.

Patti – I started to look at how I could make a living with sewing. That’s what I loved, sewing and fabric. Then I realized, you can’t really make a living doing this . . . unless you’re Vera Wang.

Karen – Did you work when your kids were growing up?

Patti – I was a dental hygienist. I always knew I wanted a family. I did the traditional career counseling tests when I was younger and I did well in math and sciences so I looked at becoming a dental hygienist. I also looked at jobs that had a flexible schedule. I didn’t love it but, I love people so that helped.

Sewing really has always been my passion; but I never dreamed I would open up a store.

So, I did the dental hygienist thing, I met James (her hubby), and I got to take 8 years off to raise my kids which was the biggest blessing ever.

Now as I look back, I see how all the pieces came together. I am not a good multitasker. I never would have been able to be a stay home mom when my kids were young and open the boutique. Plus, I never would have had the courage to open a boutique in my 40s. I was too scared. I wasn’t ready. But, then as I got older and my kids got older, I got to the point where I just said, “why not?”

Karen – One thing that is great about getting older is you find the courage to do what you’ve always wanted to do on some level.

Patti – I realize now, Blue Moon, was a God thing from the beginning.

Karen – Well, I do believe that God, the universe, wants the best for us and doors are always available to us, we just need to go through them.

Patti – If we’re willing to listen and take the time.

Karen – Yes!

Patti – I went through a lot of steps that, I now realize, led me to this point. If Christie (her oldest daughter) hadn’t gone away to school and I wouldn’t have visited that boutique that inspired me (in Franklin, Tennessee), I wouldn’t be where I’m at.

Karen – You know you’ve always been a huge source of inspiration for me. I SO admire the courage it took for you to do what you did. To just go for it! You give me hope that I can do anything, even if it’s something totally out of my wheelhouse.

Patti – James thought I was out of my mind.

Karen – I love it. He thought you were crazy but, supported you in a dream anyway. So, where do you see you and Blue Moon going? Where do you see yourself in the next 10 years?

Patti – I have no desire to franchise. I am not in it to make a million dollars. But, I’m also not in it to NOT make money. I work very hard and I want to be compensated for it. Right now I’m trying to get it more consistent and we’re definitely on an upward swing. We’re on this slow, steady climb up. I just want to keep on that steady climb.  I have some ideas about ways to grow the business that I have in the works. It’s just trial and error. The next step will reveal itself.

– I had a friend tell me, “Slow and steady wins the race.” I don’t think I need to win the race, but I’m definitely in the race. And I’m going to finish the race in whatever capacity that might be. And truthfully, it’s probably bigger that I can even imagine.

Karen – Isn’t it always?

Patti – Yes, I find every time I put good energy out-I will be rewarded.

Karen – You seem so fearless.

Patti – But, I really want to run away from what scares me.

Sometimes I am asked to public speak in this job, which I wasn’t prepared for.  But, I believe you can’t grow if you don’t face your fears and go head on into it. Which is what I have to do with public speaking.

Karen – Absolutely. I totally agree.

Patti – I don’t enjoy public speaking. But, I feel like when I shy away from my fears and don’t do something because I’m afraid, I am limiting myself in all God wants for me. But, it’s baby steps.

[Tweet “I feel like when I don’t do something because I’m afraid, I am limiting myself in all God wants for me.”]

Karen – That’s all we need to take . . . baby steps. People think we need to take these huge leaps to get out of our comfort zone. No. Not true. Baby steps or huge steps . . . it all gets us out of there. And that is where we want to be.

[Tweet “People think we need to take these huge leaps to get out of our comfort zone. Baby steps or huge steps . . . they both get us out of there.”]

Patti – I have said no in the past to things I probably should have said yes to.

 

Karen – I find that once you do something you’re fearful of, it becomes totally empowering. We really do limit ourselves through our fear and the nonsense we have going on in our head. We can do anything, but we don’t think we can so then it never happens.

[Tweet “We really do limit ourselves through our fear and the nonsense we have going on in our head. “]

Patti – I feel bad the times I have said no to public speaking because of my fear.

Karen – That’s the other thing . . . when we shrink away from things because of our fear, it feels yucky! Our insides know we are not living up to our full potential that way.

-Are you living a dream you had when younger?

Patti – No. This wasn’t ever a dream. I never would have opened a shop. The funny thing is, the worst job I ever had was selling retail in a clothing store. This is so ironic but, I hated it. I don’t like working in the shop necessarily. I love doing the buying for the shop; the accounting for the shop. I like talking to people. I love decorating the shop and the creative part.  But no, I never thought I’d own a store in a million years. But, I totally see how it happened.

Karen – What would you say your dreams were?

Patti – To have a family. To be a mom. That’s why I did dental hygiene. I wanted a flexible job.

I never wanted to own a business. It would have been too terrifying.

After the kids got older and weren’t around as much, I started thinking about doing something outside the home. I can remember sitting at church and our pastor saying, “God gives everyone a gift. You need to use your gifts.”

And I really stressed out about this; feeling like I didn’t know what my gifts were. Then a friend said, “Patti-maybe God just wants you to be a really good mother right now.”

I thought maybe he was right. That has always been my goal, first and foremost, to raise good kids.

But, it’s so brutal when you’re a stay home mom and the kids get older and your identity gets taken away.

Karen – Yes, I found myself saying,  “Who am I? Now what do I do?”  I totally relate. That’s why I started blogging. Women need to know we’re not alone in this transition. When you’re a stay home mom and you start to realize you aren’t needed as much, it really messes with your brain.

Patti – You know parenting is hard. There were a lot of sucky times.

Meanwhile my bible studies, and my cooking classes, and my workouts just weren’t doing it for me anymore.

Karen – I think those things are great, but they become kind of a distraction. They keep us from realizing our kids are growing up and we better figure out what we want to be when we grow up.

Patti – Yeah I had a rough 2-3 years.

I was a mom and I took it super seriously but, then my kids got older. You can only do so many classes, bible studies, work out sessions, etc.  It was great for a while, I was in touch with all my girlfriends (I love my friends. I think your friends get you through incredibly hard periods of life where even your family can’t). I am a big proponent of girlfriends. I also tried the volunteer thing at the school . . . that didn’t last.

When my kids were in middle school, I was sitting there like, “now what?” I knew I didn’t want to be a hygienist again. I wanted to do something I was passionate about.

I decided to volunteer at We Care (a non-profit support center meeting emergency needs of local families). But, I should tell you this, I talked about volunteering there for two years before I actually did it. My fear kept me from taking a step. But, once at We Care, I saw the dire needs of the community. The seniors on fixed incomes, the single parents, the people working several jobs to keep afloat. After I saw enough brutal heartbreaking stories, philanthropy is where I came alive. I became passionate about giving back. This was an integral piece in me opening Blue Moon; seeing first hand the needs of our community.

Then, when I went to visit my daughter in Tennessee and went to a boutique there and saw they donated a portion of their proceeds to global causes, (they’re big on Uganda), I immediately thought, “I’m going to do that and donate to local causes.”  Then when I actually opened the store, I discovered all these products that help people on the manufacturing end, so it’s really win-win.

Karen – So, it was your heart for philanthropic causes that started you on this path. It wasn’t necessarily the desire to start a boutique or be a business owner? It was your compassion.

Patti – Yes, but everything was so terrifying at first.

Karen – That’s why you inspire me.

Patti – When my youngest was getting ready to leave, I kind of panicked a little. Everyone was asking me what I was gong to do so I felt a little pressure. I was thinking about asking one of the boutiques I loved for a job.

My husband said, “You’re going to work for $10 an hour?” That was ridiculous to him.

I said  “Yes!”

I wanted to do something I loved. I love beautiful things. I love being around fabrics.

A pivotal point came when I was at the gym one day and this guy I’ve known told me he thought I was living too small.

Karen – That gives me goosebumps.

Patti – I was really upset. I felt he was referring to my role as a stay at home mom. I didn’t feel like I was living too small. I was volunteering. I was feeling okay.

So, I stopped by this boutique I loved. At this point, owning a boutique had entered my mind, but I wasn’t really doing anything about it. The owner told me that day, she had to sell the store. She was under a strict timeline so I didn’t have long to think about it. I knew I needed to try.

Karen – You have to keep taking chances. That’s how you’ll know what direction to take. If you don’t try, you’ll never know.

Patti – If you don’t try, you’ve failed.

[Tweet “If you don’t try, you’ve failed.”]

And once the ball was rolling, things just started falling into place.

My husband said, “I think you’re crazy, but I see something in you I have not seen.” Honestly, I think I was a little depressed-and scared because my identity was being taken. Being a mom was the best thing I ever did; the most rewarding. But, all of a sudden, I wasn’t needed in that role anymore.

Karen – I tell people-I think being a mom was my purpose, but it’s not my passion. I am passionate about my kids but being a mom is not my passion. I have other gifts and things that really make my soul soar.

-What’s the best advice anyone ever gave you?

Patti – A friend gave me that Eleanor Roosevelt quote on a card,  “Do Somthing That Scares You Everyday.”

I had it pinned in my shop because everything was scary. Everything I did was new. I couldn’t even catch my breath. I dropped 15 pounds. It was crazy. I wasn’t eating and I wasn’t sleeping, but I felt so good.

Karen – What did you draw on to face that fear?

Patti – It was the excitement. I was so excited. James was right, I came alive. I was an adventurous girl when I was young and something happened when I had kids.

James would always ask, “What gives you joy?” And honestly, sometimes I didn’t know.

And now finally, I’ve answered that question. Being creative gives me joy. Helping others gives me joy.

We do all have a purpose. I wish I could have figured it out earlier. But, I have to believe my job, my purpose early on was to be a good mom.

When it comes to our purpose, the timing just has to be right.

If you’re in Seal Beach, stop by and see Patti at Blue Moon, you’ll be glad you did!